:: Cher Gorman :: The Agony and the Ecstasy of Critique

The Agony and the Ecstasy of Critique

A good, constructive critique can work wonders for the struggling writer. It can give their self-confidence a boost, fill their writing sails with a much-needed gust of wind, and give them a solid push toward achieving their goals. A bad critique can severely bruise their fragile writer's ego and push them back a step or two. A crippling critique can knock them on their fanny, shove the breath from their lungs, and grind a heel into their creative windpipe.

How does a writer survive the inevitable agony and ecstasy of critique? First, give yourself some time and distance from the critique and the harsh words. When it happens to me, I generally go on a cleaning frenzy and organize closets, drawers, bookshelves and the file cabinets in my office. Then I start on my car. Afterward, I eat some chocolate, kick something that won't kick back and start writing again. You can also work in the garden, go for a walk, or talk to one of your writing friends—someone that you trust—about the experience. Support at times like this is so important. Don't ever, ever allow a harsh critiquer to have so much power over you that you stop writing altogether.

Okay, how do you do that after your manuscript is ripped to literal shreds by a critiquer? Let's suppose the person who critiqued your manuscript is a multi-published author. If they are multi-published, they obviously know a heck of a lot more about writing romance or writing in general than you. Right? Maybe. Maybe not. Why did this author feel it was necessary to stand on your face to make themselves taller? I wish I knew the answer.

For me there is only one constant as far as writing is concerned: The world of writing is a cold, brutal place. A writer has to learn to accept criticism in order to grow and improve their skills as a writer. We also have to learn which comments to consider and which ones to disregard. That can be tricky for a new writer but it is a valuable skill and worthwhile learning to develop. Acquiring Teflon skin is not easy because our writing is such a part of us and it's often difficult to separate ourselves from our work. However, in my opinion, if a writer can't stand the fire, they need to pursue something else. I hope I don't ever reach the point where I can't stand to feel the flames. I've certainly received my share of caustic comments over the years but somehow time and distance healed the wound. Writers have to learn to look beyond their own bruised ego and dig around for the gold. We have to nurture and trust our gift through the good times as well as the bad.

If a critique group or critique partner doesn't help you to nurture your dream, if they tear you down instead of building you up, it's time to move on. We need validation from our peers but we also need it from ourselves. We need to value our work and celebrate each victory no matter how small. When you present your work for critique offer it with confidence and remember that the buck stops at the editor's desk NOT the critique group, critique partner, published author, mother, best friend, contest judge or spouse. The only true opinion that counts is the editor's.

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